Carol Havens Heninger

Born just before Christmas, on December 18, 1961, Carol was named after the uplifting Christmas music sung by Christmas carolers outside the hospital room. Her parents fondly referred to her as the “caboose” of the family as the youngest of 6 kids. She grew up in Washington Terrace, Utah. As a child she developed a love for music, reveling in the opportunities to go fishing in the early morning with her dad, and growing a passionate testimony in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.

Carol became a skilled flutist and talented singer. She was so proud to march in the Calgary Stampede with her band. She qualified for the Ogden LDS Institute Chorale as a soprano, with which she went on a singing tour to Nauvoo with her sister Nancy. She loved singing with her sisters Nancy and Gloria, and she valued growing and sharing her talents. She loved ballroom dancing and would go to dances as often as she could. She graduated from Weber State with a Bachelor of Science Administrative Systems in 1987. She did administrative work for 2 years for the church office building before she transitioned to being a full time mom. She met Thane Heninger in 1988, and they married in 1989 in the Ogden Utah temple.

Carol’s most treasured goal was being a mom of a large family. Thane supported her so she could focus on her kids, on being a mom, and on her health. She committed her life and put her body on the line over 9 years to build her family. During that time she had 10 pregnancies, persevering through 5 lost births, and being blessed with the successful births of her 6 children. Scott, Jennifer, Daniel, Jonathan, Benjamin, and Carolyn.

Carol adopted the title of ‘Mama Bear’, she loved her cubs and would jump at the opportunity to fiercely defend them. She raised her kids with no doubt about what her values and beliefs were. She passed on key parts of her childhood. Her kids all learned piano and became proficient in playing at least 1 other musical instrument, they went on fishing trips with her, they listened to her and were heard by her, and they all grew up learning her faith.

Carol had limitless patience for being present. If you wanted to talk to someone, if you had a concert, swim meet, track meet, scout ceremony, talk in church, young woman’s award, hospital stay, sick day, or literally any other opportunity you’d think “Someone who loves me would be here”, she would be there, start to finish, every single time. Your opportunity to be seen was her chance to appoint herself to take a seat and be your witness.

Family was essential for her. As a child she would look for opportunities to provide help for her parents. As an adult she stayed in consistent contact with her family, visiting for holiday traditions, staying with them when they were in the hospital, even finding opportunities to serve her parents through acts like trimming her mom’s nails.

Carol valued achievement and looked for opportunities to help her kids know it. Through years of reminders, effort, reminders, support, reminders, encouragement, and also occasionally providing a few reminders, her 4 boys each earned their Eagle Scout awards, and her 2 daughters earned their Personal Progress Young Woman medallions.

Carol thought scouting was such a meaningful opportunity for learning and achieving. She gratefully worked in church scout callings over the years. She worked very hard over several years with her family to fundraise money through selling popcorn for her 4 boys to each go on the National Scout Jamboree. She coordinated the supply, sales routes and stores setups, the encouragement, and she would sell on the frontlines. She stayed involved with scouts for many years after her kids were adults. She worked at local scout stores for several years. On January 4, 2014, she earned for herself the scouting Wood Badge, an adult leadership training program that took a lot of work, she was very proud of the accomplishment.

Carol sang to her kids, played music with them, and would spend many nights engaging in their interests. She spent many hours joining in every family game night, whether she won or not, whether she understood or not, whether it was her preference or not, she wouldn’t miss an opportunity to be with family. She spent great amounts of time using her skill in sewing, crocheting, and cross stitching in service of them. She made lots of blankets for her kids, for her grand babies, and for donations. She made dolls, Halloween costumes, Christmas socks, scarfs, temple clothes, memory books, and would be the go to tailor for fixing her kids’ clothes.

Thane and Carol were married for 28 years. Carol needed a lot of support, and Thane was her primary source of care throughout most of her adult life. He supported her hopes, wants, fears, allergies, favorite foods, and the complex set of beliefs and quirks that made her who she was. Together they raised their 6 kids, loving and supporting them into becoming adults.

Thane and Carol divorced in 2017. Since then, she found great excitement and value in her 4 cherished grandkids born after: Linkin, Oliver, Simon, and Zoey. She loved her pets, valued her new community in her neighborhood friends and her church, and she continued to craft and check in on her kids.

Carol was predeceased by her mom Betty Havens in 2016, her sister Gloria Rich in 2018, her dad Glen Havens in 2022, and her son Ben in 2023.

Despite Carol’s firm testimony and strict boundaries for her kids in childhood, she was flexible and willing to accept and love her kids, whichever path they chose as adults. When most of her kids left the church, she proved her care for their wellbeing was more important than their believing. She always wanted her kids to be happy, and she would always tell them she loved them. You could tell her you’d be a therapist, a teacher, a pilot, a salesman, an office worker, a soldier, a security guard, a warehouse worker, or food service worker. And she’d still look at you with the same respect and pride and hope the best for you.

A consistent aspect of Carol’s life was constant and considerable discomfort and pain most people only ever have to deal with temporarily. She often battled fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue, migraines, many mental health challenges, joint issues resulting in needing knee replacements, blood clots, a nerve tumor when she was in her 40’s, and eventually sepsis at the end. She was forced to learn to live alongside the pain, and she so often pushed through as much as she could. Her daily life was an example of endurance, strength, patience, and determination. She had complications from a medical procedure this past July, and after fighting for 2 months, she passed away in the hospital on September 30th, 2025 in Millcreek, Utah.

We miss her warm bear hugs, her frequent laugh, her caring smile, her kind eyes, and her constant presence. We love you Mom, we hope you’re now experiencing deserved peace and joy. We hope you’re singing with angels and sharing your stories. We hope you can still witness us live and achieve from heaven. Until we meet again.

Carol is survived by her brothers: Raymond, Paul and Charles, her sister Nancy (Neil) Carter, her kids: Scott (Brittany), Jennifer (Nathan) Nisson, Daniel, Jonathan (Irene), and Carolyn, and her grandkids: Linkin, Oliver, Simon, and Zoey.

Carol’s funeral will be Friday October 10th at the LDS church at 10312 Ashley Park Dr, Sandy, UT. The viewing will start at 8:30, the funeral will start at 10:30, followed by a luncheon. She will then be buried at 2:30 pm near her parents in the Lindquist Washington Heights Memorial Park, 4500 Washington Blvd, Ogden, UT.  This service will also be available over a zoom broadcast.  The link for this broadcast will be posted on this obituary shortly before the service.